It's hard to know when what you're doing is right and good,
versus when God uses us in our mistakes and weaknesses to make things good.

Why does it bother me so much that people don't confide in me?
Friends who are close to or around me often and choose not to share their troubles and joys with me...
That seriously bugs me,
in a it-makes-me-sad kind of way. :(

WHYYYY?!???

I think it's because
I also want in.
I want to be in the loop,
in the know,
in the circle of trust and friendship.

I am so pathetic. :(
HELP ME GET RID OF THIS FEELING.

Is love not the single greatest motivating force in the world?

A mother's love for her child...
A husband's love for his wife...
God's love for us...

Even the uglier sides/consequences of love:
Jealousy - just think crimes of passion;
Selfishness & greed - love for self and/or material things
...that's all I can think of for now. :P

But seriously, think about it.
All these are things that motivate people -- in the fullest sense of the word.


And is it not sad that
today's world, today's society
has made us feel sceptical towards love,
made us feel as though it doesn't exist any more in its truest, most positive and most altruistic form?

It really saddens me when I hear my friends say that marriage is no guarantee for love.
No, of course the institution of marriage is not what makes us love, but
it is (or at least should be) a tangible expression of the ultimate love and commitment one human being can make to another.
And if you think that marriage no longer represents that,
then what does that leave you with?
-- An incessant uncertainty towards love.

That is SUCH a sad, sad consequence of our postmodern society.
I know, I cringe and hesitate at the use of that p-word, but this is honestly one of the hallmarks of this era:
Uncertainty.
C'mon, relativism is all about the absence of absolutes, which basically just means the lack of any concrete certainty.

And so,
if people nowadays are left with no sense of security at all with regards to mankind's greatest motivating force,
then we are merely empty vessels that roam the earth as sepulchres...

( I don't want you to feel bad for me. )


--

The chocolates I bought the other day at the fair are still sitting on my table,
staring at me.

Tried my first one a little while ago; it was alright.
Hopefully my appetite for them will come back.
Or it'd be quite a waste to buy them only because I had a craving for alcoholic chocolates that were never fulfilled and went away. :/ Meh!


--

Probs bedtime.
No work done today.

I just wanna crawl into bed...

Ha, sounds like a potential band name.
Anyway!
Something about these two Polaroid mods really drew me in... Thought I'd share. :)




+     +     +     ♥     +     +     +

Ooh, also, finally started drawing again tonight. Feels good.
Looks pretty good too. :)
Might scan it in and share with ze World Wide Webz if I can be bothered to. ;P

Ahh... <3

Why must you avoid this?
Your evasion of the coming conversation makes things so difficult and frustrating for me.
Maybe I should have just spoken to you on our way there, on the bus, with people around.

I gather courage and you sit on it till it's flat.

So many reasons to not like what you do right now...

-
God give me strength. :|

If I were to write a play
inspired by debbie tucker green’s random
 
If I were to write a play…
Would it be for you?
Could I write in all the pain
And all that we went through?
 
The twist of the plot,
The second chance we got;
And you crush it up like the paper that wasn’t dry
Enough for you.
 
 
If I were to write a play,
The words will not come out.
It is the soul that sings and cries in
Anguish
 
And the pen will sure dry up.

Close everything.
Close everything.
Close everything.
Meltdown.

Meltdown.